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About me?
Name: Sra
Age: 19
Sex: Female
Sign: Capricorn

Thoughts?
midterms
major paper
lonely
no computer

I like?
acceptance/affirmation

I dislike?
being excluded and/or ignored

Stuff of the Moment
Bad Habit: Feeling undesirable.
Words:"la schpoo" "dood"
Colours: camel and pink
Hair:Medium
Music: Songs from Queen of the Damned/THe Vampire Lestat
Saying: Oof.
Thinking/Singing: "Will anyone get close to me?
I'm damaged, just as I'm sure you know...
I am scared. I am alone. I am ashamed, and I need for you to know."

Pretty much writing in the livejournal now.

Godamnit.

No one else will...

To those who saw the last[now deleted] entry and replied, I thank you, to the rest of you... Well you won't read this so you get no message. And I probably don't like you. Nya.

A very infectious dream
fills your mind
and stops your heart

this rampant hate
claims viable collection
over what is left.

dammit, when did I become the unattractive wallflower?

OMFG I'M WRITING!!! I'm in a pretty good mood right now. Just got out of a not so bad philosophy class [Professor Chester the Molester, oh yea]. Am anticipating cheques on the weekend and am thinking of going out saturday night @o@.

Also handed in a group assignment in philosophy and even thought Carey wasn't there I managed to find my way to class. All alone baby. I rock the casbah.

It was good last night, Shalyn and I like just sat and talked for two hours, she's all pumped 'cause the pride prom is tonight so it was fun chatting. Bwar. I ran out of chinese noodles. Back to rice.

Mmmm sipping on smoothy fruz right now. Am very glad fruz is in terrace. Mr Sub bites my ass and Golden Wok makes me wanna cry. Seriously, nasty nasty chicken balls. Eeeeeew.

School is getting better? At least it feels like it is today.

Today is a good day.

I can't wait to get a computer again. Want to work w/ html, crazy urge. I was totally envying the cute guy in class w/ a laptop.

Anyway, gonna meander back to rez, hall will be quiet as biz students all have macroeco test. Agh. Glad am lowly arts student. Oh yea. Wheet.

So bored am reading back entries. I am lame @o@

And her mind
her mind
is floating and dripping

Hindsight makes things look so different. What was I thinking?

Oh ah am bored today! Listening to hardcore vibes and drew a little something for all those wannabe ravers in the nation!

Go to http://lick.yoll.net/hardcore.jpg to see my little precious.

*Sigh* bumming around on KaZaA brought me back to What it feels like for a girl. I think if I ever find someone that they're definitely going to have to be able to listen not only to that song but the ray of light album as well... Agh! Standards!

BTW, Grand Theft Auto: Vice City... the soundtracks are my new gods.

*droolz* harvest moon emulator...

Which Harvest Moon SNES character are you?

'Cause I looked so hard, I have to share these lovely lyrics.

Here by my side an angel
Here by my side the devil
Never turn your back on me
Never turn your back on me again.
Here by my side it’s heaven

Here by my side you are destruction
Here by my side a new color to paint the world
Never turn your back on it
Never turn your back on it again
Here by my side its heaven

Be careful
Be careful
Be careful
Be careful
This is where the world drops off
This is where the world drops off
Be careful
Be careful

And you breathe in
And you breathe out for it
Ain’t it so weird
How it makes you a weapon
And you give in
And you give out for it
Ain’t it so weird
How it makes you a weapon
Never turn your back on it
Never turn your back on it
Again…

Be careful
Be careful

Here by my side its heaven
Here by my side its heaven
Here by my side…

Exams are over and I am at home. Life is little less fucked. Still feeling real bad for mom.

Had crazy dream about telling off my father, mom wonders if I should write him [another] letter and get out all the crap. Dunno if that would be productive though...

Oi to the world.

may not write for a while as life is fucked.

sunstar
watched me fade away
did you
watch me fade away

I feel like my worth is gone
I feel like my world is gone
I wonder
where I am

I can't hide
I don't have to

I am bummmmmed.

The ending to Moulin Rouge licked my proverbial balls.

Oh mah goodness gracious, I need a new counter. The lack of counteryness bothers me.

Erm yea, so I wrote this email to the prez of WLU asking when I'm going to get my money back for services not rendered, and I actually got an email back! And it didn't say "Fuck off you lousy whore!"

I'm so heppy. One thing I shall discuss is the 40 000$ that is going back to students. But am I getting money? No. They are making a bunch of shitty 100$ random scholarships and one 500$ one that requires an essay on WLU community. [There is no community because of the strike you propaganda pandering futtbucks.] Anyway, the part that really pissed me off was the other half of the money going into fucking online periodicals. WTF?? You need 20 000$ of periodicals?! We wouldn't need the crappy online journals if our damn library was actually built!! Where's my damn money!?

Hehehehe oh yea, those guys are gonna be walking into an appointment w/ one pissed off little sra on monday.

Do do do. Why I am writing an entry at 12:23am on a saturday? This says very bad things about my social life.

Ooooof I should not be writing right now as I am verily dull and blank. Oi. Kinda bummed I missed out on Stratford antics friday night. Er other than that... Whoo Thanksgiving. Boo impending midterms and research papers.

strange things are happening
but you'd better not turn to me...

Agh just got out of first midterm, and don't think I did that well... Poo... Don't want to fail out of university!!!

Got twenty minutes still till second half of class and lecture. Oi. I feel kerblechy. Need Benylin!

Was going to change imood, but then noted am actually quite queasy. Less so than monday.

Strong strong dislike is growing for bad reggae guy. He better not sit next to me in class on monday, or I shall give him dirty looks and short answers devoid of smiling.

Do do do... Quiz things are broken, darkcounter is broken... grrr... Dislike breaking as well.

Vicky's mom's homemade lasagne is good though... Terminator 2 is good too... till you have to change it part way through 'cause your floor wants to watch ER...

I have the total urge to go goth and do Stuart Townsend style vampy eyes ^o^

...
Unfortunately he's prettier than I am...

Blar. Counters all all screwy again, prolly go down to zero soon.

400$ down, one class to go... *pleasebecheappleasebecheap*

Room is pretty darn cleanish... PLans to get home on friday settly good. Thinking about buying yogurt... MMmmmm

Had yummy grilled chicken sandwich for lunch and broccoli cheese soup for dinner. Love love LOVE Dining Hall ^o^

Julia from PO110 is so nice. Good to meet nice people ^o^

My faith has returned and the world is once again light.

The dining hall is open ^o^

I am so pissed off right now.

Finally FINALLY I was supposed to have a nice real meal, brunch in the dining hall 10 am - 2 pm.

So this morning I wake up, shower blah blah, walk on down to the dining hall, only to find that the rat bastards are not done renovations. Oh and since it's sunday, none of the other places are open. AAAAAGGGGHHHH WHY?!?!?! WWWHHHHYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!

Agh light is fading quick...

need... fud...

OK, so I think I figured out what was kinda bugging me about the icebreakers. While hot [heh], part of you knows that they have to be nice.

Am I just too picky here? It's like I am meeting people and it's nice and stuff, but isn't kind of a bummer making idle chat w/ a breaker when you know that their only purpose is to make idle chat?

Yea... Much time cheering leaves my mind wandering... They fed me last night though, yummy chicken thingys. It was good. I like fud.

OMFG here I am on a comp in the terrace, bwar didn't think I'd get in forever.

Damnit o-week people, feed me! We had no breakfast... I need fud! But place is closing so I shall go, hope everyone's week is sweet and free of twinx

Ok I feel like zero excitement. Shouldn't I be jumping or something? Whoot. Stuff is all spiffy and all I feel like doing is collapsing into bed for a few days. Not sure if it's humanly possible or not... But I think I've actually gotten into worse shape over the summer. Eeeeek.

Tra li la... Packing is almost approaching managable, but still I wonder where how why did I acquire all this stuff?

OK, I just had the scariest fucking dream ever and am now downstairs typing by James as he is the only person awake and there is no one I can go crawl into bed w/. Dammit. I have only had two really really frightening dreams in my life and both involve having my right hand chopped to bits. Yea I know that's stupid and dramatic but I think it's a leftover thing from being a/ into art and writing and b/ slightly vain.

Last time wasn't so bad because the guy just lopped my whole hand off, this time it was a crazy woman [I was somehow related?] and she went for mincing the fingers-- in the dream it was so bad my hand was bandaged and mind was just blocking the memory of pain out. Then my grandma pointed out I'd never really do art or write again after I mentioned I thought I was coping and I was crying alone in my dream. Then she got mad at me for crying [my grandma really isn't that bad]. Anyway somehow an evil house haunting and ghosts got in w/ the crazy woman and now I'm scared of a creepy low voice calling "jackie" and the friggin' dark. I'm pretty sure there's a knife-wielder behind me ready to plant one in my back waiting in the shadows, honest to god scared of the dark.

So yea... not wanting to go back to bed w/ over active evil imagination, creepy voice, and lots of things for knives to be ahind. Urrghh... Why can't I just dream of friendly sheep or something?

And... James just went to go to sleep... Crap.

Grar, last day of fudge before school yesterday. The worst part is I'm pooped and really want two days to sit on my ass in lieu of packing fun. Dammit I've had two months of [fudge] packing fun. I don't want anymore. Bleah. I want to become a backpacker, I hate owning so much stuff. I don't like that it becomes important. I wish I could chuck a lot of it. I think I need some small part of parallel space that I could just dump stuff in and go to randomly when I want it.

Buuuuut that's probably not gonna happen, so I'll go upstairs like a good little girl, do my laundry, pack my shit, deposit my cheques. Gruuuu I want a good little boy to help me w/ all this next may or whatever >=]

Everyone visit this link at least once w/ your speakers turned up real loud. I giggled two times.

I returned a call this morning that makes my morning better, AAP called while I was at work yesterday, left message blah blah, and I called them this morning. They are giving me 100$ since I am going to university and was such a sexi volunteer ^o^ Oh I so happy! This is sooo nice of them and makes me feel all special and apple cinnamon w/ raison gooey inside ^o^ teeheehee. Must go shower eventually... Verk today.

Passed a beach on the way to and from Port Huron, it reminded me very much of Mikisew. Next year I think when I find some real friends, I shall drag them up there to camp amongst the pines and fish the clear water ^o^

I bought some pretty things today, nice organizer, a black dress for commencement or various other events, a pretty rust coloured peasant top, and various other school dealies. Oh yea, some nice light running shoes, they is spiffy.

Yesterday was bummy though, greg let loose some annoyance on to my poor little self >=], but since I got the Bob the Builder lunchbox he requested for his son, I figure all shall be forgiven. Dododododo. Yep. Looking forward to sleepytime, tired <=

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